A Prayer of a Restless Spirit

Have mercy on me, Lord, for I am faint; 

     heal me, Lord, for my bones are in agony. 

My soul is in deep anguish. 

     How long, Lord, how long? 

Turn, Lord, and deliver me; 

     save me because of your unfailing love.

I am worn out from my groaning.

All night long I flood my bed with weeping
    and drench my couch with tears.

(Psalm 6:2-4, 6)

I can’t sleep Lord.

My mind is racing,

a million little things,

a few big things,

and probably too much caffeine

earlier in the day…

I toss and turn,

I can’t turn off my brain.

Questions and worries keep bubbling up:

  What if?

    What if my wife gets sick? 

    Or my children? 

    Or my parents? 

    Or my siblings?

    Or my friends?

  How long?

    How long will this go on? 

    How long will businesses be closed? 

    How long before I can worship with my flock?

  Why?

    Why is the world going through this pandemic? 

    Why couldn’t we have foreseen it? 

    Why does the COVID-19 become lethal for some, 

      but not for others? 

    Why… Why... Why...?

Worst case scenarios come to mind.

And they are frightening.

No wonder I can’t sleep tonight.

Then I remember, you have told me

that I should turn to you, 

and you will take the burden from me:

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened,

and I will give you rest.”

I think I’m going to take you up on that invitation, Lord.

Here – take my burdens, please.

Give me rest.

Have mercy, Lord.

Take my worries, my anxieties, my concerns, my burdens,

and replace them with your peace.

I know you are present with me – 

there is no darkness that can hide me from you –

and yet, I. need. to. feel. your. presence.

Come to me, I pray.

Give me your peace.

Give me rest.

Give me strength to face tomorrow.

Give me your peace.

And let me sleep.

Please.

During the season of Lent, I am “Praying with David,” using prayers from the psalms as inspiration for personal prayers.